Spare the rod, spoil the child

Hey, remember the time that I opened up a store and then promptly fell off the face of the earth for two weeks? Yeah, lets pretend for just a minute that that didn't happen. Because I want to share something really really cool.

Let me start off by saying that the story I'm about to tell is 100% true and did actually happen with me present:

So, once upon a time, I was sitting in a sermon, in a country/state that shall remain nameless, listening to a preacher that shall also remain nameless because... bless his freaking heart. In this sermon, he read from Proverbs 13:24 KJV "He that spareth his rod hateth his son: but he that loveth him chasteneth him betimes." Yeah, we usually think of that verse as the "spare the rod, spoil the child verse".

Anyways, this nameless pastor used that verse to say that spanking your children with objects is not only biblical, but demanded by God as punishment. Yeah, I wish I were making this up. You know what else I wish I was making up? He brought CHILDREN up on the stage, as he had a large cane in his hand, and asked them individually "If you were disobedient, and I hit you with this cane, would you disobey again?" And as each child gave an obvious, timid "no," the pastor looked into the congregation with a smug grin, knowing that his way was right and we were all stupid and could go crawl in a ditch. Yeah, there wasn't a person in the audience that wasn't thoroughly uncomfortable during this sermon. It was all people talked about in church for the next several weeks.


The rest of this blog post is internet research, speculation, and a hearty dose of opinion. So put your big girl panties on, because I'm about to tear that terrifying preacher a new..... uhh... patch in his blue jeans. Because I've had my coffee this morning, and I'm ready to kick some hineys. I'm not going to try to delude myself into thinking I'm some sort of theological mastermind. I'm just really good at googling stuff.

So, I looked it up (Thanks Google, who needs an Masters in Divinity when you have the INTERNET!) and I saw that the Hebrew word for "rod" in Proverbs 13:24 is "shebet". Other parts of the Bible use "shebet" as a term for a "shepherd's rod."

Get ready for the jump.

I would like to place some speculation and say that the "shebet" in Proverbs 13:24 is a shepherd's rod. Whoa, hey now!

Guess what else I learned? There are five ways that a shepherd uses his rod.

1) A symbol of guardianship over the sheep.
2) To ward off invaders or animals attacking the flock.
3) The rod could be thrown very far, on the ground next to a wandering sheep, startling it back into the flock.
4) Counting (sheep were counted as they passed under the rod)
5) The rod was also used to part the wool of a sheep so that they shepherd could check for infections or wounds

The rod was not actually meant to hit the sheep! To hit the sheep with the rod would make the sheep both fear and hate the rod and the shepherd. It's a little hard to watch over a flock of sheep when they are afraid of you or hate you. So the rod was used for Authority, Security, Guardianship, Protection, and Care. Hm..

Get ready for another jump.

This verse is not supposed to be a verse on punishment. This is a verse on how to take care of your kids! Show them who the parent is, protect them from danger, warn them from trouble, watch over them, and make sure they're healthy. Obviously if you refuse to do those things, there is something weird about how you feel about your children. If you don't spank your kids, it doesn't mean that you don't love them.

This is not some sort of anti-spanking stance, I still don't know how I feel about it yet. But puh-leeeeease don't try to justify spanking your kids with this verse. It doesn't make sense. Find another reason. And if this verse was your only reason for spanking your kids, you may have a lot of thinking to do about punishment.

Take that, What's-His-Name!

I may send him this link... But that would be witchy. Muahaha!

See you next W...whenever. Maybe next week. Maybe not. It's a mystery.

I'm going to go find a stick to beat my dogs with now.

Poisonous

So if you have seen my Facebook or Instagram in the last 24 hours, you know that Chavo and I added another animal into our house two days ago.

Her name is Roux. She is fabulous.

Our other dog, Beignet, has been a little jealous of this newest addition. Now he actually has to SHARE attention, which he is not a fan of.

Yesterday, Chavo and I were out of the apartment, and I decided not to take my purse. I've been on a weird anti-purse kick because I got tired of carrying around a 7 pound bag of my own trash. However, Beignet managed to find a Hershey bar, that I had gotten from a friend's wedding, in my purse. He also managed to eat the entire thing just before we got home.

I found maybe 1 1/2 pieces of the bar left, it was still wet, and Beignet had chocolate all over his face. Roux was across the room, acting like chocolate was beneath her. So it was no doubt that Beignet had consumed this entire chocolate bar alone. I grabbed my keys and practically flew to CVS and got the biggest bottle of peroxide I could find. Then I hauled butt back to the apartment.

And it. Was. On.

I yanked Beignet down the steps and onto the grass, and poured as much peroxide as I could down his throat. I pulled, pried, sat on, wrestled, and begged my poor baby to drink this peroxide and rid himself of a poison that would surely make him very sick, if not die. And he fought me, bit me, and scratched me to try to stop me from force-feeding him this peroxide. The panic in his eyes broke my heart. The poison was just so delicious.

I cried and cried and cried. What had I done to this poor dog? I love this dog so much, and it was my fault that he made himself so sick and miserable. I just wanted to erase the last hour and take my purse with me to wherever it was we went. Oh, and I locked us out of the apartment and had to carry Beignet to the office to get the spare key. All the office needed to give me a spare key was my drivers license, which happened to be in my pocket thanks to my anti-purse kick.

I laid on the ground, petting my poor retching dog, with snot running down my chin and sobbing. My neighbors think I'm a peach, just FYI.

After soaking both of us from head to toe with peroxide, both of us with stains of dog barf on us, we laid on the apartment floor and were miserable together. And I just started think about why Beignet would eat something so bad for him.

It was the same reason most of us do things that are bad for us. The poison is just so delicious. We fill ourselves up with poison until we are sick or dying. We kill ourselves with delicious poison, and we fight those who would do anything in their power to save us. We kick and bite and scratch at those that love us most. Those that would have, and have, died so that we don't have to hurt like this anymore.

But ridding yourself of the poison hurts. It sometimes hurts worse than the poison before it kills us. We don't like it, we don't want it. Just bring us what we think will make us feel better, the old poison, or a new one.

Beignet is fine. He didn't ingest enough chocolate to cause serious damage, but for a little while, I believed that I had grievously harmed a creature that has done nothing but loved me since he saw me. I know though, that no lesson was learned. He would eat that bar of chocolate and ten more if he could. I have to protect him from himself. But he is a dog, he doesn't know any better.

Do we know any better? Or are we just as bad as my chocolate-loving dog? How much poison will we ingest before we finally put it down and walk away?

This summer in GIFs

Considering that it is now August, I thought that I could finally write a GIF post about this last summer, because it's been super-weird.

For those of you that didn't read my last GIF post and you don't know what a GIF is, it's like a tiny little video clip. I dunno. But they're awesome.

But as I was saying, this summer has been really strange. As some of you know though, I lost my job 3 days before Chavo and I were supposed to leave for Guatemala. And I was all



But then I did this






And a little bit of this












Chavo and I then left for Guatemala for almost 3 weeks.





Which was awesome, but when we came back, I was very

So I had to think about what I wanted to do for a job.

So instead of looking for a job, I started making stuff, so it was all very

 But then I was like,

\

 

I can make stuff AS A JOB!

 

 

So I started looking into it, and I totally can!
 





Stay tuned, guys! Because it's about to get really really real up in here. So, to all the followers of Ginger Spice and Everything Nice,

Thank you for the encouragement to go after such a crazy endeavor. Y'all are the best. Applause for everyone!

My Super-Awesome Craft Table (AKA- Worst DIY Tutorial Ever)

Last week, I mentioned that the Chavo was helping me to build a craft table right out of my imagination. Well, it is complete!!!

"But Ginger Spice, that is a framed chalkboard!" Oh, but it is not JUST a framed chalkboard. It is pure magic. A craft table that folds down, and looks like a beautiful picture when up? Genius, I know.

I wanted to share this magic with everyone, especially considering that Chavo and I could not find a tutorial on something like this. We found one, but it totally sucked. And I am not about to waste my life building a sucky craft table with directions that I don't understand, so we made our own directions. Like bosses. Here are all the magical instructions that you need to build a wicked sweet craft table like mine.

Step 1: get supplies.

Chavo and I planned for this to be a 2' by 2 1/2' table with about 4" depth for cabinet space, so we got all the junk for it. That junk being 2 pieces of wood that were 2 ft long, 2 that were 2 1/2 ft. We also went ahead and got the wood for the frame, which was just wood moulding and some rod- looking like things, in the same dimensions. We also got a 2 by 2 1/2 ft panel that was thick enough that it won't break if I put my sewing machine on it. Also got 6 Small hinges. Don't worry too much about measurements, because they will get all screwed up later and you'll just end up eyeballing it anyway.

Step 2: Make a wall box.

Get the whole family involved, if you have to. This is not the frame, this is the part that is mounted to the wall, which also serves as a little space to hide a bunch of crap. Whatever, just screw the pieces together. If you are like the Chavo and me, the wood we got was super-hard (hehehehe) and took forever to screw together.

Step 3: attach the panel to the wall box.

Find some sort of magic fairies that will help you line the panel just right so you can put the hinges on without it being all crooked. We used 3 hinges, just for good measure. Two would probably work fine, but we don't know what we're doing.

Step 4: Make the frame!

A problem that Chavo and I faced was that we couldn't find moulding that was sturdy enough to serve as table legs, so we went a different route: we cut a frame out if slightly smaller wood that was sturdy enough, attached the hinges to that, and then glued the pretty frame on with wood glue. 

Your craft table is now ready to be put up!

Step 5: Mount that mother to the wall!

This is by far the hardest part. I wish there was an easier way to do it, but I have yet to figure it out except to drill serious holes before screwing it into the wall, make sure you charged the heck out of your screwdriver, and try not to get into a fight with your husband. He will win this one, because he has the power tools.

Find some way to mount this thing to the wall. If it takes you less than 3 days, congratulations, you were faster than us!!

Ta-da! The table is done!

Now slap some paint on that bad boy!

I wanted to try an antique-ish look on the frame, as well as have a chalkboard. So I painted the frame and then used homemade chalkboard paint. 

Side note: homemade chalkboard paint is simply 1 tbsp of Nonsanded tile grout for every 4 oz. of acrylic paint. Color doesn't matter!! I got the Nonsanded grout at Home Depot. I went for a simple black chalkboard though, because I'm boring.

Now, all you need is a way to keep is closed when you're not using it! I went for a super easy eye and hook latch. You only need one. How do I know that? Because I broke the second one. Go me! 

And voila! Your table/picture is now complete! 

See you next Wednesday!!

An Exciting Change of Pace

I cannot believe I am even able to say this out loud, much less post it on my blog.

I opened my own business!

It's true! It's true. "Ginger Spice and Everything Nice" is no longer just a blog. It is an actual business. I am doing something that I truly love, making things with my bare hands. It also helps that I have the ability to watch TV while doing all of this. I am making handcrafted items, focusing mainly on jewelry and home décor. My current favorite is metalwork rings.

I have to say, that I could not have done this without the Chavo. Even as I type, he is outside, on our balcony, cutting a wooden frame for my craft table, with a handsaw. He has sat next to me, gone over every point, every doubt, every tear, and believed in me. He saw what it was like for me to be unhappy with my job, and he is now doing everything in his power to see that I am happy with my work and enjoying being at home. That also includes building me the most awesome craft table from my wildest imagination. He truly is my biggest cheerleader, my #1 fan, and my most loyal supporter.

He's also pretty sexy.

With that said, I would love for my first customers to be some of my Ginger Spice and Everything Nice Blog-Readers. I set up my Etsy store, but I got a little bogged down with all of that, so keep your eyes out for new things to crop up at my store. I will try to post my new things weekly. GSEN will also be going on the road for craft shows, so you may get an opportunity to buy my stuff in person! I'll also try to keep in touch with where Chavo and I will be for craft shows, so people can come out.

I am hoping that this is the sign that things are getting better. I love being home more. I love being with my dog and my husband, without worrying that neither knows me anymore. Maybe this is the start of something really good. We could really use a win right now. I know I could. It's looking mighty nice so far though.

See you next Wednesday!

Best of: Things Your Kid Says

While I was teaching last year, my students said a LOT of funny stuff, and I managed to get it all written down, hoping to write this post. So allow me to share with you. The Top 20 Things Your Kid Says.

20. "How many years has it been since the A-Bomb was dropped on Hiroshima?" Your Kid: 3958 years

 

19. Your Kid: Miss Garcia, do you know how to do this? Your Other Kid: Breaking news, dude, she's smarter than you!

 

18. Me: What can we be prepared to do if 9/11 were to reoccur? Your Kid: Invent holograms so the plane goes right through.

 

17. Me: Someone name another thing that was invented in the 1920's. Your Kid: Catapults!

 

16. "I think WWII is like a guy fight, and the Cold War is like a girl fight. Just two countries not talking to each other."

 

15. "Miss, is this how you spell 'wedgie'?"

 

14. "Ms. Garcia, how come smart people like you always use calculators to solve math problems?"

 

13. "Ms. Garcia, were you alive during the Civil War Reconstruction?"

 

12. "Is George W. Bush still alive?"

 

11. Who was the Great Compromiser? "Dr. Phil"

 

10. "Did your dad fight in the Civil War?"

 

9. "What was Henry Clay's nickname?" Your Kid: "Kunta Kente"

 

8. Your Kid: "Are you pregnant?" Me: "No." Your Kid: "Are you just fat?" Me: "Yes, I'm just fat.

 

7. "Ms. Garcia, will you help me get this pencil lead out of this bear's butt?"

 

6. Counselor: "What do you do when a stranger is at the door?" Your Kid: "Hit them with a bat!"

 

5.  "Mrs. Garcia, are you mad? I just saw your nose flare up."

 

4.   Do you always have to say "Mon" after you say "Jamaica"?

 

3. Somebody, quick! Tell me a noun! Your Kid: YOLO!

 

2.  What COUNTRY does spaghetti come from? Your Kid: KROGER!

 

1. Where was the Mayflower Compact signed? Your Kid: At the bottom.

 

 

----------

 

Well, there you have it. The top 20 funniest things my students said this year. I'm going to miss them, but I hope they give their 6th grade teacher as much entertainment as they gave me.

 

See you next Wednesday!

And we're back!

 After a turbulent airplane ride and being detained for two hours in Customs, I can finally say:

We're home!!!!!!

But most of you don't care about that, you just want to see pictures. Well, I'll give a little bit of insight into how this trip went.

We started out with our church on their short term mission trip, and honestly, I took ABSOLUTELY no pictures. For real. Chavo took them all, and he won't give me his memory card (ahemjerkcough). But then....

Chavo and I were set free, and this was the first place we went! (Not really, I just love showing people this picture.) A boob-squirting fountain, it doesn't get any better than this.

We saw dear friends.

 We saw beautiful, beautiful things.

We ate the most AMAZING PANCAKES OF MY LIFE! 

Yeah, really, that's a pancake. Chavo and I met an 82 year old woman who owned the hotel we stayed in with my parents. She was definitely, hands down, the most interesting person I've ever met. She is the only person with the recipe for these Hugonote pancakes, and I do believe that secret recipe will die along with her. Fluffiest, most delicous pancakes I've ever had.... What was I talking about?

Oh yeah, we saw some kind of fascinating, yet terrifying things too. We managed to go to San Juan on their Patron Saint Day, just in time for their procession. There was incense and fireworks everywhere!

Tell me that isn't freaky looking!

We saw a really pretty waterfall.

And we got a lot of rest and thinking done. It was a good trip. Chavo and I are thankful to be home though. We are thankful to have such a great home to come to. It makes this Independence Day so much sweeter. We are grateful to be in a place where we are not afraid to walk the sidewalks in the daytime or flush the toilet paper down the toilet. We have done a lot of thinking about going to Guatemala long term, and we still have not reached a conclusion that is confirmed by God. At this point, it looks a lot like we won't be going to Guatemala long-term, which makes me very sad.

That said, it doesn't mean that we won't be doing missions long-term, we just are not sure that Guatemala is where God wants us. I don't know. It seems like a lot of things that we wanted really are not going to go how we planned for.  But like it always goes, God doesn't care about our plans, but we know he has better ones. It's just kind of hard to look at now when all you see is that door that just got slammed in your face.

Anyways, it's getting a little unnecessarily depressing, so here's another boob-squirting fountain!

Happy Independence Day, everyone! Go flush some toilet paper and shoot some fireworks! Im'ma go get me a hot dog.