Baptism Bloopers and why they're my favorite

This Sunday (which was totally legit and I hope they put it online), we had baptisms. It was a big Sunday, it was big missions dealio (and I got to speak twice, but I'm so getting off-track). But big Sundays are always big baptism Sundays. They baptized 4 people up there! 3 had the same last name! It was pretty cool. But one thing I noticed was that we had one of my favorite baptism bloopers.

You know, 1^st kid goes up there, sploosh, applause.

2^nd kid goes up there, sploosh, doesn't even hold his nose! Bonus points! Applause.

3^rd kid (2^nd kid's twin, who was not to be outdone), didn't hold his nose either, Applause.

4^th guy, an ADULT! He got to watch the last 3 baptisms and rehearse his lines and his choreography. But what happened? Pastor starts his cool “Upon your confession of faith...” line, and the adult already starts holding his nose! It was my favorite! It reminded me of my favorite kinds of baptism bloopers.

The Premature Nose-hold:

As with what happened this Sunday, you're in the middle of a baptism and the guy holds his nose way before he's about to get the symbolic dunk of faith. What do you do with that? Do you just hammer the awkwardness home and keep your hand at your nose? Do you take your hand down and give a sheepish look? Or do you slyly look like you were scratching your nose and TOTALLY didn't mean to do that? This has got to be my favorite baptism blooper just from the lack of ability to escape. You know, it makes a good story! Just like the time that you were trying to get to your parents' Sunday school class as a child and accidently walked into the choir loft in the middle of service.

Announcing the wrong name:

This also happened this Sunday. As I stated before, we had a set of twins getting baptized. And sure enough, the first kid got the wrong name called out. Just like Jacob and Esau, that wretched little brother got his baptism cred! (Except not really, the pastor did correct himself before the kid was dipped.) I think that this is blooper payback for those pastors who secretly giggle at the premature nose-holders.

Baptizing a tall person:

Jon Acuff talks about this on his super-cool blog “Stuff Christians Like”, but baptizing a tall person is hard! I have not tried to baptize a tall person, but trying to dunk my cousin (who is roughly like, 10 feet tall, maybe) in a swimming pool is pretty much impossible.

Not getting all the baptisee's body under water:

Mom and I discussed this yesterday. You know, baptism is a symbol and all that cool stuff, but what happens if you end up with a dry elbow after getting baptized? You may think I'm borderline insane, but don't tell me you haven't thought about it!

And my personal favorite. The super-rare, independent baptism!

I've only witnessed this once, at church camp about 6 years ago. One of my friends was getting baptized in that awesome youth-group baptism trough. If you've been to rockin' church camp like these crazy kids have these days, you know that when it comes to baptism time, it ain't your grandmother's baptism! The music is blaring, kids are screaming, confessions of faith are shouted to the rooftops of that college auditorium, its totally legit. If you want a cool baptism (and can't get to your nearest river), youth group baptism is definitely the way to go. But the energy was high, and my friend just couldn't take the pressure. So after she gives that “Yes, sir” when asked if Jesus is her personal Lord and Savior, she falls out into the trough, FULLY expecting the youth minister to be right with her on her new solo baptism. Luckily, the pastor caught her before she hit her head, but she did have to wait to dunk the rest of her.

Baptism bloopers are the greatest parts of baptism. They remind everyone that while we are announcing to the world that Jesus is our Savior, we are still the awkward people that we always were. Our lives are changing forever, dying to self, being buried with Christ, and raising to new life with Jesus, but we are not suddenly the perfect people that know all the right things to say or the right time to hold their nose for a baptism. We are God's sometime socially-awkward children, and He wouldn't have us any other way.

Oh, and they're really really funny! Name some more baptism bloopers that you've witnessed!

New friends and awesome things for the future!

2 blogs in a week?! I'm on fire! But I just couldn't miss blogging for the awesome thing that happened today.

Today, I met blogger One Righteous Babe (Bekka) for lunch! It was so fun, but asking her to go to lunch was very much like asking someone out on a date. I was all nervous, thinking "What if she says she doesn't want to eat lunch with me? What if she hates me? What if she thinks I'm desperate or worse, creepy!? What if I have bad breath? What am I going to wear?" The list goes on and on and on.

But you know what? It couldn't have gone any better. She is such a cool person, aned you should totally read her blog (www.onerighteousbabe.blogspot.com). She has such a heart for God, and I see big big plans for her. I can see us bringing the world to its knees. She's totally legit, and I was so pumped to get to have a 3 hour lunch with her. God was all over that table, it was ridiculous.

It was so good to meet you, Bekka! I hope that you, me, Jesse, and Chavo can do awesome plans for God together!

Oh, and I ordered a hamburger that was almost as big as my head. And I haven't embarrassed myself in this post yet, so that's got to change.

It was delicious too! I ate less than half, but I have a feeling I'll be eating it for dinner.

Later, everyone!



Let's not scare the children.

I'm sure you all deserve an explanation for why I have been gone for almost a month. And that's just what I'm going to give you.
And I'll tell you, its not a good one.

Well, I could play the "I've been planning a wedding and school just started and I've been working and I've been running and I've been doing homework and I've been participating in REAL social activities blah blah blah"... But see, that's just not true. Well, it is true, but its not why I haven't been blogging.

Ya see, the deal is: I ran out of ideas.
That's right, world! For the first time, Ginger Spice ran out of things to say! Except not really, my talking words-per-minute has increased exponentially, but I ran out of things funny enough to not be ashamed to put on this blog. Because let's face it, its hard to come back from showing the entire quad my butt, last spring (yeah, if you haven't read that post, its a lulu).

So what have I been doing all this time? I've been on Pinterest. And the reason that I'm not on pinterest right now is because a bunch of people I've been following made a bunch of stupid boards that they decide to pin to nonstop, like ferrets and bananas. While I have a board dedicated to mustaches, I'm not feeling the whole "ferret 'splosion" that has occurred here. So here I am, embarrassed and ashamed to have ignored you for so long.

But that's what works for you, isn't it? You're all very busy people that don't put things off to watch Law & Order: SVU for 4 hours straight (Yeah, me neither... Ok, guilty) or spend way too much time on Pinterest to make yourself feel creative when you should have been doing your Geography of Latin America homework. You don't have time to read my blog once a week. Its too long and I'm too strung out and frustratingly incoherent to waste your time with for anything less than once every 2 weeks. FINE! Ya jerks.

I'm going to attempt (spoiler: its probably not going to work) to blog once a week. Who knows? (Everyone) Maybe it'll be more than once a week! (It won't). Stop smothering me! I can't handle it. I need an adult. I'm incoherent again, I had a caramel macchiato about an hour ago.

Oh, I'm totally kidding about y'all leaving. I get a huge boost of happiness when I hear people say they enjoy my blog. I feel loved and given attention. And who doesn't love attention? So if you leave me, I'm going to start wearing leggings as pants for attention, and NO ONE wants that!!!

So quick! Tell your friends before I buy a pair of leggings to wear with a t-shirt!

Let's unstress, let's decompress.

Today, I did something I've never done before...

Dun dun DUUUUN! I got acrylic nails. So let this be my disclaimer, I am always a huge fan of correct spelling, but my nails are now twice the length they used to be... virtually in half an hour, so if you find some spelling mistakes and feel the urge to tell me, just know that I will laugh in your face and never speak to you again....

Not really, but I just don't care. ;) But with that said:

I don't know about you guys, but this week has been stress to the max. With work, school, homework, more work, getting caught up with new friends, and taking one giant leap out of my comfort zone (more on that later), I'm exhausted!

On Wednesday, I did another thing that I've never done before. I translated... for money. Yeah, that's right, someone paid me to speak in spanish. And I about had a panic attack over it Tuesday night. Luckily, Chavo helped me cash that spanish-speaking check that my english-speaking butt couldn't. But it went fine. And I made cash and did some retail therapy. And they even said they would call me back! I hope it wasn't a "you were terrible and we're never going to speak to you again, I'm deleting your number as we speak" and an actual "we'll call you back because we need a translator and you speak more spanish than we do".

But that's not what I want this blog to be about. I want this to be a chance to say what hyou need to. Maybe that's to vent, maybe its a chance to brag on yourself (without sounding like a total D-Bag), maybe its a chance to take a deep breath and not say anything. But after this, you know what's going to happen, you're going to go back out there, refreshed and ready to say "Hey Life? Bring it!" Then you're going to take your happy-butt and go translate for those Salvadorians again.... Wait... That was just me. What were we talking about again?

Oh yeah, pep talk. But I'm no good at those. SO, I recommend everyone with 5 well-needed minutes to chill to listen to this right here: http://youtu.be/sTJ7AzBIJoI No, I don't care if you've heard it before, listen to it again, and listen good. Its important. I'm going to listen to it too.

Take a chill pill. September is here. Spending time stressing over it is not enjoying the precious time that God gives you on this Earth.

Let me know what's going on. I miss hearing from everyone. How was your day? And how did you like the video?

-Ginger Spice